Restroom Review: HUB’s 3rd Floor (a BETTER one)

Background: As some of you probably do as well, I have one of those dreaded 8:10 a.m. classes. Because of this, I often find myself roaming around for a good napping spot after class. While I have a few preferred areas, this day I was beat to the punch by other fellow UCR nappers. As I was wandering around the 3rd floor of the HUB in search of a quiet and comfortable place to rest my eyes, I suddenly felt a rumbly in my tumbly and decide to take a quick (or maybe not so quick) pit stop. I stumbled upon a bathroom revelation….a SINGLE TOILET restroom! Let’s check it out…

For guys, girls, and handicaps!

Layout: As soon as I opened the door I realized I was in for a special treat. There in front of me stands one beautiful toilet. One sink. One paper towel dispenser. One EVERYTHING. This bathroom is made for ONE person! (at a time at least) I sure feel special! Score: 5/5

Perfect....just perfect...

Cleanliness: This restroom is obviously not very well known, which really surprised me with it being in one of the most popular buildings on campus. There are no paper towels on the floor; they’re actually in the trash can! (imagine that) No turds left floating for the next unsuspecting user. Not even any pee puddles left on the seat OR floor. Zilch! Nothing! Nada! I mean, it even SMELLS good…more on that later. Score: 5/5

Clean AND motion detected flush 🙂

Amenities: As soon as I walked into this restroom I noticed all of its state of the art bathroom equipment. Motion sensor toilet…check! Motion sensor faucet…check! Motion sensor paper towel dispenser…check! Things are looking on the up and up for this restroom. But it wasn’t until I was pleasantly relaxing on the old lavatory when I realized its true beauty. The motion activated AIR FRESHENER promptly sprayed some of its heavenly goodness into the air and right into my nostrils. Not only do I not have to smell other people’s poop, I don’t even have to smell my own! Score: 5/5

It sees me...

Privacy: Single…..toilet….bathroom….Don’t get me started on this again! I feel this bathroom was made just for ME! (or any other lucky pass byer for that matter) Score: 5/5

Closing Statement: This relatively unknown miracle of a bathroom is every public pooper’s dream-come-true. Because of this (and my immense generosity) I will even give you the short cut directions straight to it! In between the student services building and the HUB there is a set of outside stairs that lead to the 2nd floor of the HUB. However, don’t stop there. Look a bit harder and you’ll see MORE stairs that lead up to the 3rd floor of the HUB. Take no concern that I am leading you in through a fire escape, for that door leads to pure pooping ecstasy!

THE VERDICT:

5/5 Toilets – Pooper’s Paradise!

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